The Phenomena of the Desert Island Couple
Break apart a human brain,
or a primate brain (if one is handier), and under all the folds of
grey matter, just slightly above the midbase region exists a
collection of neurons labeled the VTA. This would be the pleasure
center of the brain and it is these collection of neurons that
regulates the reward pathway circuitry of the human body. It
dispatches an organic chemical called dopamine. The release of
dopamine inside the body causes heart rates to increase and other
physiological responses associated with enjoyment and bliss. The
evolutionary development of this pleasure/reward system is useful in
personal human development. This reward system is the center of
experience, learning, motivation and the reinforcement of behaviors.
So everything we experience, what we do, how we act, the people we
meet, what we read and consume, all the things in our lives that we
come into contact with in the external world that brings pleasure
will cause this particular region of the brain to fire away and
release dopamine into our systems.
This neurological-chemical
ballet that happens inside us does so at varying intensities. We
hear a funny joke and it brings laughter and joy. But, if we hear
the same joke another time and then another time it doesn't elicit
the same amount of laughter or joy as the first time we heard the
joke. Especially, if that particular joke relies on surprise for
humor. The brain can predict the outcome and is already ahead of
the joke. So, as one would expect the brain activity inside the VTA
will be much less than before, releasing lesser and lesser amounts of
dopamine over time. Sometimes there can be too much of a good
thing. If we're exposed to the same external stimulus no matter how
initially pleasurable, this repeated exposure will likely lessen the
dopamine rush of pleasure we received the first time. For the most
part.
But, for whatever quirk of
biology, there is a short list of things in this world I find I still
enjoy even after experiencing them for the up-teenth time. There are
certain movies where repeated viewings does not diminish their
ability to entertain me. Such as, no matter how many countless times
I have already seen Goodfellas, or Raiders of the lost ark, if I
catch them on TV, those movies continue to draw me in and I will
watch all the way to the end. I can still laugh at the same
honeymooners episodes over and over even though I can recite every
bit of dialogue verbatim at this point in my life. There are some
songs that I can listen to on endless loop. Some foods, like Somoa
Girl Scout Cookies, I would be fine eating for every meal. For me
(and I believe in others, as well) there are a handful of earthly
things and activities that never fails to activate that part of the
brain that generates pleasure. The level of intensity of which
endures.
Which brings me to the
familiar topic of the eponymous 'Desert Island List.' The list of
albums, movies, books, or tv shows one would hypothetically prefer to
have to keep company with until the end of days if stranded on a
desert island. These collection of lists are all personal in nature
bowing to matters of individual tastes. There is value in
pragmatically evaluating the media we experience and create order of
those items that have enriched and informed a life. The exercise of
making these lists usually becomes a way of taking a snapshot of a
person's identity, creating a personality profile. Ultimately, for
anybody, these lists would have to include those pop cultural
artifacts that would continue to forever generate the same amount of
dopamine released inside an individual's body, bringing delight even
after multiple exposure over many years.
There have been many
neurological studies measuring the decline of passion amongst married
couples. It's commonplace for relationships to experience a level of
passion fatigue. Usually after 2 years into the marriage there is a
marked drop off from the initial, unbridled romantic feelings that
existed in the early stages of the relationship. It seems the brain
cannot continue to muster that same intensity of biological/chemical
alchemy between married couples after a time. Brain scans actually
measured the level of brain activity within the VTA of married test
subjects upon seeing their partner, and as expected the level of VTA
activity diminished most after 2 years. Unable to sustain that
initial level of passion, married couples will transition into a
different less intense stage that relies on compassionate bonding.
For the most part.
There were exceptions. For
a few couples that were married over many years, the VTA activity in
fact didn't diminish, according to some brain imaging results by the
Department of Psychology at Stony Brook University. With these
couples, seeing facial images of their spouse triggered the same
level of VTA activity as one would expect from seeing their spouse in
the early stages of the relationship. Amazingly, it would seem
seeing their partner generated the same amount of dopamine-induced
bliss similar to seeing their partner for the first time. So, it
appears there are married couples well suited to be stranded on a
desert island. The desert island couple - where familiarity breeds
contentment.
Maybe if we were to
analyze the things that still excite after multiple viewings, find
shared themes or common threads, dissect why these particular books,
movies or songs resonate with the same intensity and other ones do
not, we can figure out what kind of mate would engender the same
continued excitement over time? Is there a correlation between a
person's perfect album side and their perfect mate?
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